I watched with joy as one of my very good friends got married on Saturday, the 20th of October, 2007. Exactly 6 years after they got engaged. Okay so she's not the first of my friends to get married, then why the hype?
Often times, there's always a little history before a woman gets married. I'm talking about the X-factor, yes the X-boyfriend, or boyfriends as the case may be. Call me old-fashioned, call me conservative, but the truth is we(women)are better off without those "X"es.
This marriage resulted from my friend's one and only relationship. Apart from her Christian upbringing, I often wondered what made her a little more reserved towards the guys in the university. Don't get me wrong though, it wasn't that she wouldn't talk with them, but there was just a way she conducted herself around them.
This is not to say that you have to be engaged before you conduct yourself in an appropriate manner, but you should at all times.
I on the other hand thought myself a free-spirit. I'd hug all the guys, jump on them, talk nasty with them. Of course this "free-spiritedness" had its consequences,though at the time, I felt i was living life and having fun. I look back now and wish that I had calmed down and not let my excitement and eagerness to "feel among" get the better of me.
It was my dream as a young girl that whoever I dated would be the person I'd marry. Even though I didn't live that dream, I'm a strong advocate for it.
There is another detail of great importance in all this. The seal of approval from God. No matter how good you think a guy or girl is, only God can see the whole true picture. So when you think you've stumbled upon Mrs. Right or Mr. Right, take them up to the Lord in prayer for approval before going toO deep.
Congratulations to Mr&Mrs. Fabajo. God bless you and keep you. I await the naming ceremony.
Wednesday 24 October 2007
Tuesday 16 October 2007
Conscience rules
I believe everyone is born with a conscience; the ability to tell right from wrong.
A conscience is that red light that blinks when you’re approaching your limit. It’s the soft little voice that speaks to you from the inside, amidst the loudness and madness.
Most of the time, you deny the existence of this “true friend”, whose only interest is what’s best for you. You do this to afford yourself the luxury of doing what you want. However one truth I have come to realize is that you can suppress this inner voice but you can never kill it. It breathes as you breathe and thus lives as long as you live too. I’ve heard people talk about a bad conscience. You were created to love others, so how come you go about killing them? It’s the same thing with a conscience, it was created to prevent evil thoughts and actions, to caution and to protect, but when you ignore its call and go ahead with your evil intentions, you say it’s a bad conscience.
Sometimes, you think you know where you’re going; you think you know what’s waiting for you around the corner; you keep up your speed and ignore all the signs. You approach a sharp bend, the red light is blinking furiously now, but you still don’t stop. You think you’ve got it all under control, and then…. BANG!!! You don’t see it coming, it’s a head-on collision, the impact is deadly and all too soon you see a blinding light as your life flashes past; then a momentary pause filled with a knowing regret, “I should have stopped”, then the darkness, and all is lost.
A conscience is that red light that blinks when you’re approaching your limit. It’s the soft little voice that speaks to you from the inside, amidst the loudness and madness.
Most of the time, you deny the existence of this “true friend”, whose only interest is what’s best for you. You do this to afford yourself the luxury of doing what you want. However one truth I have come to realize is that you can suppress this inner voice but you can never kill it. It breathes as you breathe and thus lives as long as you live too. I’ve heard people talk about a bad conscience. You were created to love others, so how come you go about killing them? It’s the same thing with a conscience, it was created to prevent evil thoughts and actions, to caution and to protect, but when you ignore its call and go ahead with your evil intentions, you say it’s a bad conscience.
Sometimes, you think you know where you’re going; you think you know what’s waiting for you around the corner; you keep up your speed and ignore all the signs. You approach a sharp bend, the red light is blinking furiously now, but you still don’t stop. You think you’ve got it all under control, and then…. BANG!!! You don’t see it coming, it’s a head-on collision, the impact is deadly and all too soon you see a blinding light as your life flashes past; then a momentary pause filled with a knowing regret, “I should have stopped”, then the darkness, and all is lost.
Monday 15 October 2007
To be or Not to Be
It’s so easy to get lost in doing something that isn’t worthwhile and so easy to remain focused doing something that has absolutely no value.
I convince myself that the reason why it's easy is because it requires little or no effort- but that's where I've got it all wrong! I'm just channeling the same energy in another direction.
I find it hard to focus on writing, I have a good story in my head, I begin to type away at it, then the next thing I remember I have this beautiful card game that I haven’t finished playing. The next thing I know I’m spending hours on it, starting and restarting and finally, Hurray! I win.
I look at the time, it’s already very late, I tell myself there’s no way I can make sense out of the story I’ve written , or rather, I tell myself that I should be too tired to think and besides tomorrow is another day, I’ll start early and remain focused.
The next day comes and what happens, I do the same thing all over again.
Who can help me out of this? The truth is I’m the only one who can get me out. This is what is called self control and just like keeping fit, I have to exercise it.
Its not enough to repeat a couple of self help lines. Total application is necessary to make the transformation complete.
I am glad to say that I have made some progress in that direction and I pray for the strength not to relent and give up.
Sometimes we are the obstacles in our path to success and greatness. We can be either one of two things; our greatest stumbling block or our greatest stepping stone.The question is which would you rather be?
Monday 8 October 2007
Much ado about sex
Now sex comes in different forms: there's Pure sex-which is sex between married couples; Adulterated sex- which is sex between two spouses from different marriages, or one married partner and a single partner; Pre-marital sex- sex between partners who are unmarried.
Sometimes i ask myself,would the world would be a better place, if we all stuck to pure sex? Is it really possible to abstain from sex until marriage?(for both men and women), is it possible to remain loyal and faithful to your spouse till death do you part?
Apart from the risk of sexually transmitted diseases, sex in any other form but its pure form is always damaging be it psychological, emotional, spiritual or physical.
Sex is a form of bonding which should be shared with only one other person (your spouse)as long as you both live. Outside this, one can never fully experience the true fulfilment that goes along with it.
So why do we human beings deliberately close our minds to the right way of living and embrace ugliness and unhappiness, then turn around beat ourselves and cry and say that the world is a wicked place. When truly, we are responsible for evrything.
Sometimes i ask myself,would the world would be a better place, if we all stuck to pure sex? Is it really possible to abstain from sex until marriage?(for both men and women), is it possible to remain loyal and faithful to your spouse till death do you part?
Apart from the risk of sexually transmitted diseases, sex in any other form but its pure form is always damaging be it psychological, emotional, spiritual or physical.
Sex is a form of bonding which should be shared with only one other person (your spouse)as long as you both live. Outside this, one can never fully experience the true fulfilment that goes along with it.
So why do we human beings deliberately close our minds to the right way of living and embrace ugliness and unhappiness, then turn around beat ourselves and cry and say that the world is a wicked place. When truly, we are responsible for evrything.
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